Married to your Maiden name

Since I am just days away from becoming a “Mrs.” I’ve had to answer two questions like a broken record:

  1. Are you ready?
  2. Will you change your name?

In my mind, the first question is worthy of a quick and cheerful “yes!” I’ve been engaged for over a year. As much as I adore wedding planning, and documenting each decision, I’m completely ready to walk down the aisle. I’m even more excited and ready to reverse the runway as a married woman. The walk back with my groom means our marriage is official!

The second question, however, has required more thought and reflection. I’ve always loved being a “Drew.” I am forever proud of my grandparents who arrived at Ellis Island from Poland and courageously accepted a revised surname with the hope for a bright future. Diereczinski was far too long and complicated. From 1946 forward, my family embraced Drew as a way of life, rather than just a new name.

On June 20th, the Peterman’s will be smiling from the other side of the chuppah. Not long after I met the parents of my prince, John Benner Peterman II let me in on a little family memo. The Peterman’s are perfect and perfection is intimidating!

unnamed-5

Pretty soon I will be sharing everything with my groom.

But, will I choose to share his last name?

So what to do?

  1. Remain married to my maiden name…I do love Drew.
  2. Hyphenate?…Sarah Helen Drew-Peterman (a long, yet wholesome choice).
  3. Drop Drew?…The most common, conservative option, I suppose.

With nine days left and three options calling my name, I have realized that this question is worth careful consideration. Since writing is my passion, line of work and pride, I have considered the possibility of keeping Sarah Drew as my pen name. I know several women who maintain their maiden title for professional reasons, personal preferences, or a little bit of both. A last name does not define a strong, fruitful marriage.

Here’s my final thought: Don’t feel pressured to make a quick decision. Names can change, but hopefully the husband sticks.

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